Beautiful Mess

WW: The last baby hair

2009-11-04T03:34:00.000-08:00

Thing 6 is getting a haircut today. It's WAY past time. I've selfishly let him look like a little girl for about 6 months. Because this is The Last baby hair I will ever have, and even though we have 6 kids, and I know We're GOOD with that... it still makes me sad to think that my baby is now a toddler... and that today marks the beginning of a baby free life :(

So while I go find some chocolate to console myself in... YOU can go check out more Wordless (and Not So Wordless) Wednesdays @5minutesformom.

Other places you can find Wordless, OR
Not So Wordless Wednesday's include
(but are not limited to...) ....

Tackle It Tuesday: I might be a slacker.

2009-11-02T17:22:00.000-08:00

It took me like... half a pot of Coffee to be all Yay Monday! this morning. And umm... By the way, this morning has now become Yesterday morning. I have a million posts started. And a big fat ZERO actually ready to publish.

Aaaand... Apparently I overestimated my Smackdown Power because I'm still Tackling last Tuesday's laundry.

But I did have some Productive Moments. And I was Inspired. And Motivated. And Encouraged. AND I learned something new.

Back in the day there was a place in Greece that the Athenians called Mars Hill. (Areopagus)

All the people would go there everyday and chill. Gather, fellowship... whatever you want to call it. And the people would Prophesy (reveal by divine inspiration) or speak about the ways God was moving in their lives, the knowledge, discernment and understanding that He was giving them...

I think that's awesome.

I'm working on Being Bold In Christ but.. well... maybe not so much.

So often I'll talk to someone, or read something and think... "I really need to say ____" Aaand then I don't. I have all this knowledge that I just choose not to share.

Don't get me wrong... I don't have it because I'm Super Smart or anything. More like Super Stubborn and He has had to teach me Alot of things The Hard Way. Which sucked. Atleast at the time. I should want to help others avoid that by sharing what I've learned right?

So, this week, along with my Ocean of Laundry (which, so you know, is now All Clean... However it is also completely covering the pool table, just sitting there, waiting to be Folded and Put Away) I am going to be Cleaning House on the Inside.

I am tackling... ME.

(Yesss I need Lots and Lots of Hard Core Prayer ;)

Have something you need to tackle?
Go see the girls at 5min4mom and hook up with Mr Linky. Tell us what you’re up to… housework and otherwise... :)

Tackle It Tuesday on a Wordless Wednesday

2009-10-28T06:31:00.001-07:00

Add all of these together and you have a pretty accurate visual of the Ocean of Laundry that I've been doggy paddling through this week.

And most of them look like this....

So I'm Putting The Smackdown on it.

And then I'm going to Shout It Out.

Because by yesterday of next week it will look like this...

Sigh. OKAY it will really look like this...

But I'm good with that too :)

For more Tackle It Tuesday's and/or Wordless Wednesday go see the girls @ 5min4mom

Other places you can find Wordless, OR
Not So Wordless Wednesday's include
(but are not limited to...) ....

RTT: So Lotta Random, so little time...

2009-10-27T09:42:00.000-07:00

I haven't done Random Tuesdays in a while because there have been So Many Other Things keeping me busy. So busy in fact, that I was actually scared to open my Google Reader this morning. But I Kept On Persevering through the fear and clicked on it anyway and up pops Keely. I just couldn't resist her Efficiency.

Yesterday I did something new. I decided I was going to Embrace the FreshNewStartness of Mondays. Sadly, Monday decided not to Return My Embrace. Rude! So.... Yay Tuesday!

I think I am going to Stop Overanalyzing the fact that I over analyze Everything and just go with it. HOWEVER, I believe that "A closed mouth gathers no foot." which leads to me think that Brevity is Good. So I'm not going to overanalyze things Out Loud anymore.

This doesn't count because I'm typing Quietly.

Thing4 was talking to me after school about how his day had been. I was listening to him while I was cleaning the kitchen. Which means asking Alot of Very Specific questions if you want to know anything important and otherwise MMhmmm'ing in the right places.

Cause I'm a good mom like that ;)

He tells me he learned SO Much and I was like You DID? That's Awesome! What did you learn? Ummm..... I can't really remember.

AND THEN... "My friend Jacob told me he has a coochie. Mommy what's a coochie?"
WHAT!?
Ya.
So, I'm thinking I'm going to be hs'ing next year.
Because if my KINDER-GARDENER is hearing that word,
WTSamHeck is my 3rd Grader hearing?

Speaking of my 3rd Grader. Yesterday Thing2 tells me that she learned all about Child Abuse. Most of it she had already heard from us, though some of their *details were different. In her words...

Thing2: "They talked about all kinds of abuse. Ya we learned about Sexual Abuse and, you know the Kind That Hurts You." BUT they had these puppets .. blah Blah BLAH"
Me (thinking this would be a perfect opportunity to reinforce a few facts): "Did they talk about Blah and Blah? And do you remember that blah Blah BLAH?"
Thing2: Ya mom. I know I know. BUT THESE PUPPETS..."

So glad to see that she Got The Point......

Apparently, I do not Adapt Well To Change because I am NOT happy that someone broke my Facebook. WtHeck!? Really?? I LOVE my friends. So much. But I just don't feel the need to know Every Single Thing they do. Do we really Need to know every time they become Friends with SomeoneIDon'tKnow? or are a Fan of SomeCrapIDon'tCareAbout? NOPE. Not so much.

Life Tip: Make sure you get dressed BEFORE you make your coffee K!? No need to thank me. I'm just Looking Out for YOU.

My kids are So Freakin Excited about halloween being this weekend. We don't normally do traditional halloweeny stuff. But this year a friend is having a birthday/ Trick Or Treating party. So we're going to go. I just want to make sure that they understand that ~~I get ALL of the Peanut M & Ms~~ we are not going to crack out on candy for the next week.

Now go post your own Random Tuesday Thoughts and link up @ The UnMom.com because I cleared out my Google Reader and now I have absolutely nothing to distract me from my laundry :)

Ya so I had this amazing plan....

2009-10-26T05:54:00.001-07:00

to Embrace the FreshNewStartness of Mondays...

I was inspired by This Post and some of the comments because, well, me and Mondays have just never been friends.

Fridays excite me because I know for Two Whole Days the only thing I really have to worry about is the kids.

Okay, let me rephrase that... The only thing I have to worry about during the day is the kids... and then I can get my CDO on at night Cleaning Up All The Messes because I don't have to wake up at the ~~butt~~crack of Dawn the next morning.

But they made Monday sound SO wonderful! All of a sudden Monday became so exciting... Fresh and New and Full of Hope.

Ummm... ya.

So this morning, I wake up to "IT'S 7:30 I WAS SUPPOSED TO LEAVE FOR WORK A 1/2 HOUR AGO. I gotta leave RIGHT NOW! Aaaand btw, the kids missed the bus.. "

Did I mention that we only have 1 car right now?

And I look at the alarm clocks (YES, I use Two) and they are both BLINKING obnoxiously...

Apparently, Monday is not Returning My Embrace. Thankfully I don't have to Depend On Mondays for a Fresh New Start.

So for those of you who are like me...

PS. On a happier note.. I got a (Much Needed) new bra this weekend and, well, ... My boobs totally rock today! Just sayin....

Quotable Sunday: Total Momsense :) Because THIS is what I say, on ANY given day.

2009-10-25T09:05:00.000-07:00

And, Anita Renfroe just rocks. I was lucky enough to see her at WOF 2008 and she is Hi-Larious.

Momsense

Get up now
Get up now
Get up out of bed
Wash your face
Brush your teeth
Comb your sleepy head
Here's your clothes
And your shoes
Hear the words I said
Get up now
Get up and make your bed
Are you hot?
Are you cold?
Are you wearing that?
Where's your books and your lunch and your homework at?
Grab your coat and your gloves and your scarf and hat
Don't forget you got to feed the cat
Eat your breakfast
The experts tell us it's the most important meal of all
Take your vitamins so you will grow up one day to be big and tall
Please remember the orthodontist will be seeing you at three today?
Don't forget your piano lesson is this afternoon
So you must play
Don't shovel
Chew slowly
But hurry
The bus is here
Be careful
Come back here
Did you wash behind your ears?
Play outside
Don't play rough
Would you just play fair?
Be polite
Make a friend
Don't forget to share
Work it out
Wait your turn
Never take a dare
Get along
Don't make me come down there
Clean your room
Fold your clothes
Put your stuff away
Make your bed
Do it now
Do we have all day?
Were you born in a barn?
Would you like some hay
Can you even hear a word I say?
Answer the phone
Get Off the phone
Don't sit so close
Turn it down
No texting at the table
No more computer time tonight
Your iPod's my iPod if you don't listen up
Where you going and with whom and what time do you think you're coming home?
Saying thank you, please, excuse me
Makes you welcome everywhere you roam
You'll appreciate my wisdom
Someday when you're older and you're grown
Can't wait 'til you have a couple little children of your own
You'll thank me for the counsel I gave you so willingly
But right now
I thank you NOT to roll your eyes at me
Close your mouth when you chew
Would appreciate
Take a bite
Maybe two
Of the stuff you hate
Use your fork
Do not you burp
Or I'll set you straight
Eat the food I put upon your plate
Get an A, Get the door
Don't get smart with me
Get a Grip
Get in here I'll count to 3
Get a job
Get a life
Get a PhD
Get a dose of...
I don't care who started it
You're grounded until your 36
Get your story straight
And tell the truth for once for heaven's sake
And if all your friends jumped off a cliff
Would you jump too?
If I've said it once, I've said at least a thousand times before that
You're too old to act this way
It must be your father's DNA
Look at me when I am talking
Stand up straight when you walk
A place for everything
And everything must be in place
Stop crying or I'll give you something real to cry about
Oh!
Brush your teeth
Wash your face
Get your PJs on
Get in bed
Get a hug
Say a prayer with Mom
Don't forget
I love you
**KISS**
And tomorrow we will do this all again because a mom's work never ends
You don't need the reason why
Because
Because
Because
Because
I said so
I said so
I said so
I said so
I'm the Mom
The mom
The mom
The mom
The mom
Ta-da

Now go see Toni @ A Daily Dose for more...

But shhhh.. she really doesn't like screaming.

PS. If you love Momsense you've gotta watch Total Momsense.

All we need is Love.

2009-10-24T07:24:00.000-07:00

Go after a life of love as if your life depended on it—because it does.

That's all. You can continue with the rest of your day now ;)

8 Crucial Safety Tips for Women and Girls

2009-10-22T11:05:00.000-07:00

Because this kind of thing happens all too often, and the Season of Shopping is quickly approaching (a little too quickly if you ask me ;) AND I just got this awesomely informative email, I wanted to make sure ya'll take EXTRA steps to keep you and yours SAFE.

So here are 8 Crucial Tips to remember in an emergency situation. (Woohoo a List. My favorite!)

Tip from Tae Kwon Do ~ the elbow is the strongest point on your body. If you're close enough to use it, DO!
If a robber asks for your purse or wallet DO NOT HAND IT TO HIM. Toss it AWAY from you. Chances are he's more interested in IT than YOU and will go for the wallet, giving you the opportunity to RUN LIKE HECK! (I added that last part ;)
If you're ever thrown into the trunk of a car, kick the tail light, stick your arm out and wave it like crazy. The abductor won't see you, but everyone else will. This has saved lives.
We (women) have a tendency to sit in our cars and do STUFF before we drive away (balancing checkbooks, making Lists or phone calls) This is the Perfect Opportunity for Predator to slip into your passenger seat and put a gun to your head. AS SOON AS YOU GET INTO OUR CAR LOCK THE DOORS AND LEAVE. If somehow a predator does get into your car DO NOT DRIVE OFF. Instead gun the engine and drive into ANYTHING as quickly as possible. Your airbag will save you and a wrecking your car is a much better option than being found dead in some remote location.
A few notes about getting into your car in a parking lot/ garage: A. ALWAYS have your keys ready. B. Pay attention to your surroundings; Look around you and look inside your car. C. If you're parked next to a big van, get into your car through the passenger side. There have been several women abducted by being pulled into a van while getting into their cars. D. Look at the car parked on the driver's side of your vehicle,
and the passenger side... If a male is sitting alone in the seat nearest your car, you may want to walk backinto the mall, or work, and get a guard/policeman to walk you back out.IT IS ALWAYS BETTER TO BE SAFE THAN SORRY. (And better paranoid than dead.)
ALWAYS take the elevator instead of the stairs.
Stairwells are horrible places to be alone and the perfect crime spot.
This is especially true at NIGHT!
If the predator has a gun and you are not under his control, ALWAYS RUN!
The predator will only hit you (a running target) 4 in 100 times; and even then,
it most likely WILL NOT be a vital organ. RUN, Preferably in a zig -zag pattern!
As women, we are always trying to be sympathetic: STOP It may get you raped, or killed.
Ted Bundy, the serial killer, was a good-looking, well educated man, who ALWAYS played
on the sympathies of unsuspecting women. He walked with a cane, or a limp, and often
asked 'for help' into his vehicle or with his vehicle, which is when he abducted
his next victim.

To be perfectly honest, some of them seem a little out there to me, BUT I would definitely go for the paranoid option way before the dead one ;)

Want more info on staying safe? Here are some GREAT links.

The Top Ten Things Every Woman Should Know about Personal Safety

Serious Safety Tips for Women

Personal Safety Tips for Women

Feel free to SHARE these tips with your friends, daughters, moms etc. and if you know of any Safety Tips for Women and Girls I'd LOVE to hear them.

WW: You're so pretty. Ya, I know.

2009-10-21T06:07:00.001-07:00

I think I'm going to have to lock her up when she hits 14.

Just pretend like you don't see THAT MESS on my kitchen counter M'kay?

See more (possibly cleaner) Wordless Wednesdays @ 5 Minutes for Mom

Because Ashton Kutcher Just Rocks!

2009-09-30T05:28:00.000-07:00

@aplusk Spent the day digging a well and watering goats with the warriors and bead girls of the Samburu. Humbling experience.

Having a chat with my new friend Lupeta

As if you need another reason to ~~stalk~~ follow aplusk on Twitter ;)

See more Wordless Wednesdays @ 5min4mom

Going Balls to the Wall... :7 Things to 7 people.

2009-09-24T19:24:00.000-07:00

As in, Things I Wish I Could Say To You But Can't and Probably Never Will...

Did you know that the saying "balls to the wall" has nothing at ALL to do with testicles? It is totally a flying reference that implies giving it all you've got, so feel free to say it in church!

this comes from a very reliable source...

I have been struggling with some things lately. Several things, actually.

Remember when I said I wish there was a way to 27 thing fling my mind? Well, I have been Opening Up Boxes filled with Issues that have been Packed Up and taken with me Everywhere, and I have finally decided to do a little Decluttering.

I have some things that I think I need to get off my chest.

So...
I'm just gonna put it all out there...
Balls to the Wall...

Here we go...

I hope that someday you can see me for who I try to be. And I'm sorry that's not always the same as who I end up being. Please, just... have a little faith in me. I know I can do this.
I really really need you right now. So much. I'm going through some things that I know you could help me with. I want to ask for your help, but I can't. You are such an amazing person... and... I want you to keep thinking that I am amazing too.
I wish I could find a way to share my Faith with you. I see how much you need it... and it's a Gift that I have been given in abundance. And, while I am soooo thankful for that gift, if I knew how, if I could ease your struggles even a tiny bit, it would be yours in less than a heartbeat.
It reeeaaally sucks that you're never there for me when I need you. And, please don't take this the wrong way because I love you and I will always be here for you No Matter What but... 98% of the drama that you spend so much time worrying yourself sick over is Self Created. Remember??? The definition of Insane is doing the Same Thing and Expecting Change.
I get the feeling you don't really want to talk to me. If that's the case well, then... just keep doing what you're doing I guess... But I think you're one of the most beautiful, transparent passionate people I've ever met. And I think about you almost every day.
It hurts me to watch you never get any further than trying to make yourself happy. When will you realize that your flesh can never be fully satisfied? Every time you satisfy one desire, there will be another bigger, darker desire waiting to take it's place. This is where depravity is born. Please don't waste your life mistaking physical pleasure for love... or numbing your emotions with alcohol instead of just dealing with your realities. You are beautiful and you're worth so much more than that.
I know I've forgiven you and we've moved on. I truly believe that we are in a completely different place now. But sometimes I can't help but think about it. And... I still don't understand how you could do that to me...

Okay that was only a 7 Thing Fling. But I can only dig so deep at one time. And they were Heavy so it still counts as 27 ;)

Everybody needs an Emmett.

2009-09-23T12:40:00.000-07:00

One of the speakers at the Women of Faith conference this year was Lisa Welchel. I don't know if you remember her or not but once upon a time she played Blaire on The Facts of Life.

To be completely honest with you, I wasn't really looking forward to hearing her speak. I don't know why. I have absolutely nothing against the woman.

Ironically enough, she was the one that God used to speak to me the most.

Ya. He's pretty funny that way :)

It was kind of weird actually because the details and circumstances of my life are nothing like hers. But the emotions and the isolation that she experienced... the walls that she built around herself... I was surprised to find that I could relate to every single thing that came out of her mouth.

At one point she was talking about when she attended a WOF conference (before she started speaking) and she went with Anita Renfroe, who spoke last year. If you're not familiar with her you should look her up. She is hi-lar-ious.

Anyway, she was sitting there listening to Marilyn Meberg (also VERY funny!) talk about all of these things she's been through and how she wouldn't have been able to make it through any of it without Emmett who was this amazing friend and then she went on to describe their friendship...

And Lisa Welchel talked about how it just hit her, right then and there how she had closed herself off from having open authentic relationships with other women and other people for so long and all she could do was sit there and cry...

And she said (this is Lisa talking...), "Anita took one look at me and asked 'You don't have an Emmett do you?' And I said 'Noooooo.' and then Anita says 'Well... I would make a sucky Emmett but I'm going to pray for you to find yours.'

And as I was sitting there... in that arena filled with thousands of other women... listening to her share her life I realized that I have done the same exact thing.

I have built walls around myself so high and so solid that it would probably take longer to tear them down than the Great Wall of China.

As I came to this realization, the tears just started streaming and all I could do was just Pray for God to start tearing down those walls... and to send me my Emmett too.

Since that little Emotional Breakdown I've also realized that there are things that I am meant to share with others. That I need to stop feeling unworthy and ashamed and... afraid.

He has plans for me. Because somewhere out there is someone who needs ME to be their Emmett.

Because sick is just no funnn!

2009-09-16T05:31:00.000-07:00

Go see more Wordless (& Not SO Wordless) Wednesdaysssss:) @ 5 Minutes for Mom

OR...

< insert funny title here >

2009-09-01T09:42:00.000-07:00

Even if some people were early and some people were late and I was SO thrown off I almost didn't know what day it is....

Thing6 has been watching (then repeating) the other Things.
Especially Thing4, which is just a little disturbing...
He can now say my name 3 different ways. "Mom!Mom!Mom!" "Mamamamamamama" and "Mommmyyyyyyyyyy!"
SO cute!
Did you know that I have a bellybuttonring?
I got it pierced the.minute.I.turned.18. and I've had it ever since.
Through ALL 6 pregnancies.
And 4 C-sections.
Amazingly enough it looks exactly the same. I wonder if I'm like Extra Elastickey there or something.
I really really want to get my eyebrow pierced. 2 little barbells.
IDk why. I've always wanted to.
I also have a tattoo.
A tribal Sun on the back of my neck.
You know, so that when I get old and all wrinkly no one will be able to see it....
unless I get wrinkly AND bald.
I'm getting another tattoo.
Six little footprints going up the outside of my calf.
I wonder if that's the kind of stuff that makes my SIL say things like "You? A soccer mom??? More like Alanis!"
I wonder if I should be offended by that...
I'm not going to be because really, Alanis.Just.Rocks.
Apparently I have a previously undiscovered aptitude for being a thug.
That's right.
I am Hard.Core! now so... watch out.
What can I say? Sometimes it just feels good to rob a pimp.
I wish that God had given us a *Butthead clause in marriage.
I have searched and searched for where it says something like... "In some circumstances, ~~such as buttheadedhusbands~~ you will not be held responsible for the biting sarcasm that unwittingly tries to spew forth from your lips."
Would you believe that there is Nothing in there like that?
I KNOW!
I was shocked too.
I guess I'll just have to keep trying to be an Excellent Wife...
as opposed to the ~~sometimes sucky~~ soso wife that i usually am.
OMGosh!
I just saw the Sexiest.Man.Ever. IDK what he looked like but he had a sponge and a mop and it was hott!
That was so exciting I stopped in the middle of writing this to facebook it!
Oh and speaking of sexy men and cleaning...
The Dopest Baby Daddy Ever! brought me home a new sponge yesterday.
It was so random...
Do you think he might have read the whole cleaninggetsmehott thing???
Hmmmm... maybe he'll just Get Lucky tonight and I'll kill Zombies with him ;)

I think Keely might be antiEdward
so you should go over there
and ~~kick her~~ see her...

-w8kj_5OXJrOr41x_bs45rz7CqU.txt

2009-09-01T08:47:00.000-07:00

WW Thing5 and String Bandaids. OH and Thing4 being NICE. Let's not forget that ;)

2009-08-19T06:00:00.000-07:00

I don't know if you can tell from these ~~totally crappy~~ absolutely amazing pictures but there are 4 stitches in that gash on Thing5's head. And she still has a pretty nice goose egg underneath.

Bleeding, PeePee dancing, Flashing... You know... All of the usual stuff you do in a week...

2009-08-18T05:00:00.000-07:00

So last week was a pretty interesting week.
Not exactly the Most.Hellacious.Day.EVER! type of week, but still... definitely not boring.
Not that we actually have very many boring days around here to begin with.
The more I think about it... boring could be good for a little while.
Just so you know...
I am NOT writing anything else about PEE or URINE or POTTY TRAINING EVER again!
For 2 reasons.

It seems to be prophetic.

You would not believe what Thing2 did!

She keeps a bag packed... always!... just in case someone happens to come over and wants her to spend the night.

Even though the only place I ever let her stay is the grandparents.

Apparently someone took all of her stuff out of the bag and it was nowhere to be found.

She decided that Thing3 MUST HAVE taken it and hidden it.

Or... at the very least, left their door unlocked and allowed the little ones in to wreak havoc with her precious stuff.

And for that Thing3 MUST be punished!

So she proceeded to PEE in Thing3's bag because that somehow made it FAIR.

WTHECK?????

What is that???

I cannot even begin to wrap my mind around that concept.

I guess she was a little... *pissed.

Hahahahahaaa.

Okay. Moving on...

2. Someone searched peepee dance aaaaand my blog came up 1st thing.

Along with some really really freaky creepy stuff.

Like anonymous peepee dance groups.

And strange videos.

And peepee kings.

Did you know that someone will actually PAY you to do ...er... wierd peepee dance stuff????

May I just say.... EEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!

And those are just things that I saw right off the search page. I was too creeped out to actually click on any of those links....

So, no more peepee here. Nope. You will not see the word peepee here again.

As far as the internet is concerned... we no longer pee at my house ;)

Thing5 busted her head open. As in huge hole in her forehead with LOTS of blood loss and screaming and gnashing of teeth.
4 stitches worth of busting her head open actually.
She hit it on the edge of a concrete bench.
Out of 6 kids she's the first to have to be rushed to the E.R.
So I'm doing pretty darn good here!
And she was AMAZING.
Beyond amazing.
The.MOST.Amazing.Child.EVER!
When they came in to do the stitches the guy wanted to *papoose her. As in wrap her up in a sheet like a mummy so she couldn't move.
WTH??
The guy was like "Yeah it just makes it easier to keep them still. We've found that most kids fight us when it comes time to do stitches.
Umm... YA! I'm sure the whole mummy sheet thing has NOTHING to do with that.
So I was adamant about NO turning my sweet little 3yo into a mummy. And we told her she had to lay down and be really really still so the doctor could put the *string band aids in her head so it can heal.
She says "It's okay. God is already healing it."
And I told her that God sent the doctors to give her band aids"
She laid perfectly still the whole.entire.time.
She didn't move.
She didn't cry.
She didn't even whimper.
It's like she just went inside herself until it was all over.
She was absolute awesomeness.
So I gave her my peanut M&M's.

I think Thing2 is showing Doctor Potential.

Thing2: "I know just what to do mommy! Thing5... What does 2+2 equal???"

Thing5... who just turned 3 and has NO idea what 2+2 equals on ANY day: "2+2 equals... my head is BLEEDING!"

Thing2: "OH MY GOSH I think she has BRAIN DAMAGE!"

I read something about the more colorful your food is the better it’s supposed to be for you. I think I might even have read it on one of the rtt's from last week.
So I'm wondering if that's real.
And if it includes M&M's.
Because if it is true then they should definitely count.
They are VERY colorful ;)

Apparently I am now in the *business of flashing.
Construction crews no less.
I had a lil help from Thing6.

I was outside talking to a neighbor holding a WIGGLY Thing6. Who decided to pull my shirt down. And you could see.. well..things that are usually NOT seen... And to top it all off 3 construction trucks happened to be rolling by... death by mortification....

I know. Last week was Naked Random Thoughts.
And I said I was definitely NOT getting naked.
I guess I just felt left out....

Keely has all her clothes on this week

The one where God goes from whispering to kicking....

2009-08-13T07:22:00.000-07:00

I've been having some sucky wife moments lately.

Quite a few of them.

Okay. ALOT of them actually.

I need to change some things. Mostly some attitudes that I have towards my husband based on different things in our past.

Things I had supposedly LET GO of but obviously not since I've also still been holding them against him and sometimes even throwing them up in his face.

Not so much out loud but definitely in my head.

Last night we were talking about our marriage and the different roles and responsibilities we each have in our marriage.

Adam's *punishment in the whole Fall.Of.Man. incident was to have to LABOR, which is something my husband struggled with for a looong time. Not so much that he minded working, just that he wanted to do what HE wanted to do, HIS way, which was not so much conducive to... having a stable income.

Eve's punishment was, and I quote "with pain you will give birth to children. Your desire will be for your husband, and he will rule over you."

So I sucked up the pain pretty gracefully.

The desire came easily and naturally. At one time in a completely UNHEALTHY way where my desperation for my husband ranked MUCH higher than my desperation for my CREATOR at which point I was taught a lesson about that in such a way that my entire life completely imploded, exploded and pretty much fell apart before my very eyes. I was crushed and shattered and ...broken. Very very broken. (Thankfully I was also picked up and pieced back together and made much much stronger.) But that experience was SO extreme that I will NEVER forget it and make that mistake again.

Tha last part though...

He will RULE OVER YOU.

Well... I just kinda skipped it

Because that is a tough.pill.to.swallow. Atleast for me.

I like the part that says "Understand and support your husband in ways that show your support for Christ" better because that makes it much easier to justify MY opinions. As in "Well, I don't think Christ would support that SO I don't have to SUBMIT.

Because YUCK! I don't like that word and all that it implies. I submit in theory but NOT in my Spirit and my Heart and my Mind where it actually counts. I submit PHYSICALLY but only when I feel like it's something I should submit to or if I think he deserves it. And even then it's more likely than not that I'm doing it with the attitude of "I'm only doing this because I WANT to and YOU should feel SO thankful to have a wife who submits.

YAY! Lucky him!!!

Not a whole lot of submission for a *submissive wife is it??? Kinda defeats the whole purpose.

When I saw this study on an awesomely inspiring friends blog a while back part of me was like "OH! I need this!!!!" and another part (the more dominant one at the time) was like "WHAT.EV.ER."

Now I've come back to it AGAIN! Because I'm slow that way and didn't take the hint the first time.

And I'm just gonna DO IT!

So Pray For Me!

Pray very very hard ;)

i find it fascinating that SarahJessicaParker can go from butt ugly to insanely hot in a split second. It’s like a hidden super power and I want it!

2009-08-11T05:31:00.000-07:00

So Keely's on vacation and has a *guest poster for rtt this week. And one of her random thoughts was "I’ve been watching Sex and the City reruns lately since there’s nothing else on. I find it fascinating that (naked or clothed) Sarah Jessica Parker can go from being butt ugly to insanely hot in a split second. It’s like a hidden super power and I want it."
And I thought "That is SO true! & I want it too!!!"
That made me laugh SO hard I almost peed in my pants. Thank God for SuperMommyStopMidTinklePowers or we might have had a problem.
Okay. I would have had a problem. But it's nice to share....
This is probably the kind of stuff that makes my blog come up when people search for things like what do you feel if you urinate.
Ummm... like you don't have to pee anymore???
I'm guessing.
I could be wrong ;)
I cannot figure out why the thing.i.hate.! is the thing that will keep my kids happy and quiet for HOURS???
They love mud.
The dirty kind.
They love it so much that I'm aboutthiscloseto grabbing a handful and taking it to Sherwin Williams to get matching paint.
Speaking of dirty things...
Yesterday I spent most of the day unplugged because I decided it would be a great idea to open up my mouse and clean it.
And then it quit working.
Next time I ~~am SO anal retentive~~ feel the need to take things APART to clean dirt that you can't even see I'm going to tell Martha to just.shut.up! and I'm leaving it dirty.
Potty training tip ~ if you toss a Cheerio into the toilet after you flush it every time the next time a boy ... any boy... uses it... he WILL aim.
Doesn't matter how old they are. There's just something about peeing on a cheerio. It is impossible for them NOT to.
Idk why cause I'm not *equipped to stand and aim but... it is a Proven Fact.
Last night one of Our Favorite Neighborhood Strays was hangin out in the man.cave. with SuperDope and I was just sitting out there listening to their ~~nonsense~~ conversation and the whole time I was thinking... Dude! I am SO glad I don't have a penis.

I am definitely not getting naked
(you are welcome!)
but there's no telling what they're doing over here...

WW So you think you can (peepee) dance?

2009-07-29T05:38:00.000-07:00

Gotta go, Gotta go, Gotta go right now...

I found those extremely amusing. Butmaybeit'sjustme ;)

Umm...ya. Sorry. I've really just got nothing here....

2009-07-27T18:16:00.000-07:00

Random

Something unexpected and irrelevant, but often amusing. A very over-used word now, please people, use it when something really is random. See example below for a true example of random.

Holly: Sorry to hear your hamster died Bob...

Bob: Window cleaners for British rail should watch out for flying man-eating deckchairs today, swimming in from the south along with the flea-ridden coathangers. The calf needs the blinds shut due to his purple parrot problem, and the pet washing line needs a slap round the face for dropping the flying monkey on the "queen of the night" tulips. The muffin man is responsible for the sudden outburst of rain yesterday as he forgot to pay the rent on his blue strawberries. I'm sorry, did you say you wanted a biscuit?

Holly: Random! Custard cream please.

I just can't stop thinking about this baby. Stellan's story is... beautiful and ... heart wrenching and ...
It made me cry more than the end of Prince Caspian.
I was boohoo'in just watching that clip.
I know. But it's sad!
That movie absolutely rocks.
Just so you know... the girls and I totally karoakied that song when I was looking up that link.
Aaaaand... we rocked!
We're thinking of putting that up on You Tube.
Hahahahaha.
There is a reason that I sing in the car.
So Stellan's story reminded me of this one time...
Okay. I cannot think the phrase "this one time" without immediately ending it with *at band camp.
Idk why.
As I was saying, reading the posts about Stellan took my mind back to when I was pregnant with Thing3.
I was on COMPLETE bed rest for the.entire.pregnancy.
She was born at 27 weeks and spent about 2 months in the NICU.
That was... excruciating. To say the least.
I seriously thought I was going to die from *the Mommy Guilt.
That's a real thing. Ask any mom.
You feel guilty for leaving the ones at home to be at the hospital.
You feel guilty for leaving the one at the hospital to be at home.
You feel guilty cause you're SO tired from running back and forth that all you really want to do is take a loooong nap and just kinda... wakeupwhenit'sallover.
And you feel completely useless because really... there is nothing you can do to change it.
Until you remember that you can get on your knees.
In prayer people! Bring it up from the gutter ;)
Thing3 is 7 years old now.
And perfect!
She is the physical essence of my faith.
And the hope that other people need to cling to.
Look how cute she is...

I am so rockin Alanis right.now.
I thought you might like to know that.
Aaaaand I am just all outta random for today...

But Keely's the queen of random.
I bet she never runs out

Oh ya! Almost forgot.

I'm gonna get a bff.
I'm not really up on that whole thing anymore so...
Is there like a store or something that you can get one of those at?
Hit me up if you have one you don't need any more. K?

....when mere words are just not enough to express the intensity of your... love...

2009-07-23T08:19:00.000-07:00

Dear ~~Recent Acquirer of Buttheadedness~~, ~~Man Who Has Not Washed The First Dish In Eleven E.L.E.V.E.N. Years~~, Love of my Life,

~~You are getting on.my.last.nerve~~...

~~You know how You Are A Boy, and sometimes boys.are.stupid~~...

~~Remember when I said it was okay that you forgot my peanut m&m's like 5 different times? Well~~...

Even though sometimes...likerightthisveryminute...i really just... want to...well... kick you...you are some how still totally able to reach down into all of my prepubescent girlie giddiness and make me feel like this on any given day.

Just wanted to let you know I was thinking of you.

Love ~~most of the time~~ always,
Your Wife. Remember me? You know, the woman who gave birth to crazy amounts of kids for you and makes sure you have clean boxers every.single.day and is hoping you lose your latest personality acquisitionvery very quickly before I lose what little bit of patience I have left and NO I'm not praying for more patience because you know what happens when you pray for more patience all you get is more chances to practice it and... Your adoring wife.

Ps. ~~Would it really kill you to RememberTheFreakin M&M's just once~~ Hope you're thinking of me too.

Edited to add:

Pss. or pps. or ssp or...whatever! You must have been diggin on my psychic vibe cause you totally rocked the m&m's today. In all of their dark chocolatey goodness.

I bet JenniJiggity gets M&M's...

WW I didn't write it I just found it so don't be mad at me if you're offended... BUT maybe God likes Chocolate too.....

2009-07-22T10:56:00.000-07:00

Or maybe He was pissed and this is the guy who wrote the sign......

idk.

But now I really really want some chocolate ... or eeewwwww maybe not.

And God said: Sex is Good...but only if you're married and definently NOT with vampires wearing dirty clothes.

2009-07-21T06:20:00.000-07:00

Yes that's me... wearing the only thing I have left clean in the whole house.
I totally don't get how it's possible for my laundry to multiply all by itself and then just lay around waiting for ~~someone~~ me to come along and wash it.
Sometimes I think in cheesy song titles.
Usually it's 80's Hair Band songs that come to mind.
IDK why but theres a cheesy 80's song title to go with just about every random thought that pops in my head.
It's okay. I have a wide assortment of whines to go with it.
If someone wanted to pay me to just think up random ideas for them that would be the.perfect.job.
Seriously. I'm thinkin of putting up an ad.
If you ~~have absolutely NO imagination~~ need a Creative Thinker and are looking to hire someone who has ~~waaay too much~~ a plethora of brilliant ideas... halla at ur girl. Cause I totally rock at that ;)
Think I'll have many takers?
Wanna know why 75% of America thinks church is a joke and All Christians Are Evil Hypocrites????
Because of Crap.Like.This.
Really??? Really???
I'm SO disgusted that I am just fresh outta funny.
But you know who's not outta funny?
Anita Renfroe.
I saw her at Women of Faith last year and she completely.crackered.me.up!
And she wrote an awesome book with her husband called Songs in the Key of Solomon. In The Word and In The Mood."
Can't get your man to get into devotionals???
This is the book for you!
Cause what man is gonna say NO to a 10 minute devotional with a GUARANTEED sumthingsumthing for him at the end???
Speaking of books...
I now have proof that I'm not the only one ~~obsessed with~~ who likes Twilight and is ~~counting down the days~~ waiting patiently for the New Moon premiere which I ~~just happen to know is Nov. 20th~~ think is sometime in November.
Who wants to take me??? Anybody????
As much as I liked the Twilight series I'm not really into the whole vampire thing but I did read the Sookie Stackhouse Series by Charlaine Harris.
However... it turned out to be more like Twilight meets Soft.Core.Porn with lots of blood and ickiness and not so much anything like Twilight.
Aaaand the series based on the books (HBO's Trueblood) is even worse.
Although there is a hot blonde vampire.....
But when theBiggestThingofThemAll makes a comment about how much boobage is on a show, well... you know it's bad cause he really likes....vampires.
Okay. Not really. He's more a zombie kind of guy. It's the boobage that keeps him coming back for more ;)
I had to add this. I totally just had to regulate on Thing1 and Thing2 List.Style. Yep. I made them sit across from each other at the table and stare at each other and write 20 good things about the other.

P.s. It must have worked because all of a sudden there is no more arguing :)

What? Not enough aimless, arbitrary, purposeless, indiscriminate crap for you? Then go see Keely at The UnMom for more ...

Come Out Come Out Wherever You Are.

2009-07-15T19:38:00.000-07:00

Pssst.

Hey you.

Mr. Sunshine.
How ya been? Haven't really seen you much lately.

I know you're pretty busy. You know, giving light to the world and all.

Lately I've been pretty darn busy too. Even busier than usual.

Because I have 6 children, SIX children at home all.day.long. and since they can't go outside they've been more than a little creative about occupying themselves.

INSIDE.my.house!

There have been frogs and skateboard ramps and water fights with the sprayer thingie on my kitchen sink. And end.less. hours of Hannah Montana.

So look, since we're both so busy here lets just be real and make this quick so we can get back to what we have to do.

I 'm totally onto you.

I've heard, from a very reputable source that you've been ALL OVER South Tampa like a crackhead on.... well, crack.

Ya. South Tampa is nice. I grew up there. I like it too.

Hyde Park & Ballast Point rock. I know.

But YOU cannot play favorites. It is your JOB to shine on everyone.

I demand my sunshiny day rights!

So go out there and ...shine.

Well. Maybe ...not so much right now.

Cause it's like midnight here and some people just might not like that so much.

I bet She has sunshine.

WW Note to self: Don't Piss Off Mooses

2009-07-15T05:49:00.000-07:00

Run Forrest. Ruuuuuuuun

Random Linky Bloghoppin Stuff. On A Tuesday.

2009-07-14T10:34:00.000-07:00

All of my favorite things in 1 post!

Lists, Multi-tasking and Efficiency.

Woohoo!

We're takin a walk on the *wild side;)

I know.

Martha, Martha, Martha!

She pops up so much lately I'm beginning to think she's a whole 'nother personality.

Would that make me schizophrenic or is that only if I start talking to her???

IDK.

So here are some random things about me that you might not know ~~and probably didn't want to~~ but have always wanted to.

I hate small talk. Even if you call it "fellowship" and serve doughnuts.
I'm shy. Really. Just pass the doughnuts, and please don't make me talk.
Unless I know you. Then you probably won't be able to shut me up. Because chances are you're the FIRST adult conversation I've had all week.
So I guess you get that I'm not big on social settings.
or public restrooms.
or other things that smell bad.
I really really love Febreeze.
and Shout.
I can use an ENTIRE bottle of Shout in 3 days.
I really really do not love laundry.
It is possible to feed kids all.day.long and then look up at 4pm and realize you forgot to eat. Again.
And then you're so hungry you could eat ... well ... something you normally wouldn't.
I keeping a running estimate of the caloric values of everything I eat in mind.
If we are what we eat, I am 1/3 veggies, 1/3 carbs, and 1/3 Chocolate Chip Cookies.
If you’re ~~anal retentive~~ ocd enough to calculate calories and then admit to extreme cookie consumption, you probably should not make such information public.
I write inspirational, * chick lit.
Would love to be published one day.
But would hate all the social scenes that might involve.
Stormie O’Martian’s The Power of a Praying Wife was Marriage.Changing.
My husband and I have been inseparable since the day we met.
We were very young.
And very, very stupid.
And God has done SO much with us that now I would only add 1 notveryemphatic very before the stupid.
And that's saying ALOT.
God is really really good.
I like to talk to Him when I'm half asleep snuggled under the covers.
And when I'm driving.
Which often makes the people driving beside me look at me like I'm insane for talking to myself.
30% of those times I might...actually... be talking to myself.
I have to go Google Bing Right.Now. because I saw an ad while I was checking my email and Martha says I must find out what it is immediately!

Ya'll have a great day!

You say goodbye and I say hello.

2009-07-10T18:00:00.000-07:00

That is the song that pops in my mind every time I see or hear the word Aloha.

Hello hello. I don't know why you say goodbye I say hello.

I think that was a target/publix/oldnavy/couldusealittlehelphere commercial too.

I know.

I'm a little late on the Aloha Friday thing

Sorry I was busy.

Heather completed the quiz "What kind of crazy are you" with the result...

Obsessive Compulsive Disorder.

You would have OCD - you may find yourself having to do everything 5 times, cleaning the bathroom floor in the middle of the night because you worry bugs will attack if you don't, or walking through a small path in your house because you have stacks of junk everywhere else..

Wed at 12:57pm · Comment · Like Unlike · Show Feedback (4)Hide Feedback (4) · Take this quiz!

Darn you Martha mind!

Do you think the Facebook Quiz people are watching me? How would they know that???

I bet they read my blog!

I'm also this Prince song.

Which was kinda surprising because I'm not shiny. or fast.

Really.

In a test against mom 3 out of 4 Things can outrun me.

They don't realize that yet because they don't plan very strategically and usually back themselves into a corner.

At which time I conveniently choose to catch them.

But.. ssshhhhh. Don't tell them that.

If I remember correctly however ... Prince was pretty.darn.shiny.

I know. It's okay. I only took 2. And one of them was on Wednesday!

No need to come at me with an intervention or anything.

Calm down ... and we'll just change the subject.

So ...

Since I am SO late and ~~waaay to lazy~~ too tired to think up a whole new question...

I thought perhaps some of you may just want to revisit Aloha ~~Edward~~ Friday from last week.

No? I'm the only one who wants to ~~see him~~ read that again.

Alrighty then.

Don't judge me. I saw your answers to last weeks question.

His hotness is the epitome of all hotness.

However, that's about as far as the thought goes.
There's no lingering ... "must.have.him."'s
or ... "ooohifiwasn'tmarried.."'s

Nope.

MORE than taken care of in that department.

Literally:) (Urockbaby!)

Oh come on! I'm sure that's not a HUGE secret or anything. I mean ...

We do have 6 kids.

It's OK. We're married. It's allowed.

However when I see the *hotness that is the epitome of all hotness, I do think ... "WoW! Yummy eye candy. Good job God. U rock!" ... aaaaand then I move on to something else.

Gotta give props where props are due.

Aloha ;)

Open Letter to .. my Wild Child

2009-07-09T15:08:00.000-07:00

Dear Thing4,

I love you. I love you sooooo much. I really really do.

Butt seriouslyyy... you make me completely insane sometimes.

I say "NO THING4 DON"T JUMP THOSE STEPS ON THAT SKATEBOARD. It's a CONCRETE FLOOR for goodness sake! You'll BUST YOUR HEAD OPEN." And you look at me, and listen to all of my reasons why you should.not.do.that. And then you consider ... aaaand ... "Nah. Don't worry Mom. That won't happen to me. I know how to do this."

And when I ~~think I~~ finally have you convinced not to pretend your Tony Hawk inside my house, and I turn around to chase after Thing6 who has learned how to take off his diaper and RUUUUUNNN while laughing hysterically because he is winning, I hear your delighted shout of glee "I KNEW I could do it. Right On."

I mean, really. WTHeck am I supposed to do with you?

ALL of my threats of "because you could hurt yourself" are just tossed right out the window that Thing5 has opened and is now trying to climb out of.

And when I feebly say "Ya. Well. You COULD have gotten hurt" you just grin at me and sing "So what who cares?? I got Jesus baby." (No more Lecrae for YOU!)

Aaaand apparently, you do. Because if you didn't your head would most likely have been split in two long long ago.

If I know nothing else, I so know ONE thing.

With you as my son I will NEVER. ever. ever. forget that I need Him too.

Because I surely do suck at being your mom all by myself.

Oh Ya! YOU too can join JenniJiggity every week for Open Letter Thursday.

All you have to do is Write an Open Letter on your blog, and include a link to Jiggety Jigg (you can grab my button)!

Then go to her site, sign the Mr. Linky Widget, and visit the other bloggers who are playing along!

Aloha *Edward Friday

2009-07-03T09:05:00.000-07:00

Via...

It’s time for another Aloha Friday, the day that you take it easy and look forward to the weekend, in Hawaii and in *mommy blog land. As you should know by now, over at An Island Life, Kailani decided that on Fridays she would take it easy on posting and ask a simple question for you to answer. Nothing that requires a lengthy response.

So, in honor of *Aloha Friday I ask you ...

Do you think theBiggestThingOfThemAll would mind if I hung this up in our bedroom???

Who would YOU put on YOUR bedroom wall???

It's okay Baby. It's just for the hair. Really.

If you’d like to participate, just post your own question on your blog and leave your link at An Island Life’s blog. Don’t forget to visit the other participants! It’s a great way to make new bloggy friends!

The Mommy Confessions ... but God said yes!

2009-07-03T06:12:00.000-07:00

It's Friday once again.
Time for another round of...

Not only is Thing1 smarter than me, but he's also a better person.

Yesterday he called me on not being nice.

Of course, the conversation I was having was with theBiggestThingofThemAll and we were OUTSIDE the back door almost whispering so the ONLY way Thing1 could have heard was with his EAR to the DOOR and really ... you can't complain too much about hearing something you don't want to hear when you are EAVESDROPPING...

But what I said wasn't nice.

At all.

And Thing1 did hear.

*Hanging head in shame*

While I was feeling guilty for that I decided I might as well feel guilty for not being so nice earlier too so...

Woman of questionable morality ... I shouldn't have...questioned your morality.

Even if you do make it way.too.easy by twittering pics of yourself with no pants on.

Maybe you just can't help yourself.

While I'm confessing, I should probably also mention my ineffective discipline techniques.

Yesterday Thing4 got in trouble for having something that he wasn't supposed to have, and I said "But you didn't even ask..."

He replied "Ya. I asked God. And He said yes!"

Dead serious. With a totally straight face.

Aaaand I just walked away laughing.

The Mommy Confessions is a weekly series by Life Starring the Kids & Me.

As moms, many of us have things that we would like to get off our chests or that we would just like to confess. So here is the place to do it!

Once you read here, pop over to her page and link up with Mr. Linky (if he's in the mood).

Join in and spill it....

What's YOUR Mommy Confession?

WW Giving New Meaning To The Term *Happy Ass

2009-07-01T09:20:00.000-07:00

Do you see what I see???

Theory #1 The Walmart mascot is attempting an escape!

Theory #2 This lady was SHOPLIFTING the Walmart Smiley face….

IDK But it crackered me up.

So while your contemplating those profound theories, go check out some more Wordless Wedsnesdays or... if you have issues keeping your mouth shut you can also check out some Wordful Wednesdays

Have a great day!

So, apparently it's Friday.

2009-06-26T16:49:00.000-07:00

And that means it's time for...

Hmm... what to confess what to confess???

Such a hard decision.

Because I SO rock and have very few things to confess?

Umm... ya. You can think that if you want. But if you want to know the truth....

Okay.

ButRememberYouAskedForIt.

You didn't?

Well, your getting it anyway.

AND you're getting it in List Form.

Because I just saw the Listiest.List.Ever.

Aaaand ... now I want to make one.

I have to get the Martha out somewhere.

Lucky you.

I am totally jealous of Christine's Listiest.List.Ever & I'm secretly plotting to make a Listier.Listiest.List.Ever.

I ... am a horrible horrible friend. Yep. I totally suck. If my friends call me I will always make time for them. They all know they can show up at my house, any time they want or need to. And they do. But, I don't really call much. I mean, I could call. But I'm not so sure they'd be happy when I called them at 1:30 in the morning. Because, for some odd reason, that is always about the time I think about calling people. I think I've made it to like 3 birthday parties. Iwasonlyontimefor1. I also made it to a bridal shower, a bachelorette party, and was in a wedding. Which I was on time for. You're welcome Jene:) So...this was actually a pretty good year! In all fairness I did warn them all up front. But since they are SO amazing they love me anyway. And not only do they call, they are always at birthday parties. Wow. You guys really do rock;)

Umm... let's see. What else.

I am always late. Always. No matter what. And it makes me insane. I hate to be late. But, it seemed like the harder I tried to be on time, the later I was. Um. Ya. Soooo I don't really try anymore. Now ... I kinda just roll with it. Oddly enough, I've been alot less late. And, just to let ya know. I know when I'm late. So you know how you call me ... to tell me that I'm late, forcing me to stop whatever it is I am doing and answer the phone so you won't be mad at me for being late and not answering the phone??? Ya. That just makes me later. Because I have to STOP what I'm doing. I know. I'm late. I'm really really sorry. Again. I suck. But... I still have to finish whatever it was that was making me late in the first place.

And, usually... when I say I'm fine what I really mean is that I am FreakedoutInsecureNeuroticandEmotionallyunstable. But ... fine sounds much better. ONLY read the 1st and the3rd ones. The others are just... well ... disturbing. If you can't control yourself and ONLY read those 2 DON'T CLICK THE LINK. I really should put a disclaimer on here somewhere about those links. Whaddya think? *I am not responsible for the content behind the links. I just found it. I didn't write it.

I'm going to stop now because I think I'm giving myself a complex.

Don't worry I'll be *fine. Really.

Open Letter to ... The Creator. Ya. It's late. So what?

2009-06-25T20:35:00.000-07:00

Dear God,

Please forgive me for wasting time taking a few Facebook quizzes today.

Well, maybe it was more like...5 Facebook quizzes... and .... umm... 1 Twitter quiz.

Okay 2 Twitter quizzes but only because I had to have a redo when I took the "Which NKOTB Member Are You Destined To Be With?" quiz. I think we both know that Jonathan Knight was just all kinds of the wrong answer!

Please forgive me for alwaaaaays being late. Like I am with this post. Which should have been up yesterday.

And please forgive me for losing my patience with Thing4 when he cleaned the kitchen floor with toothpaste last night.

Thanks for all of the awesome *things You give me.
And for making Thing6 the*MostCutestBabyEver sooooo snuggly:)
And quiet.

And Thank You for the *minty fresh scent in my kitchen now. It goes well with the Mr. Clean w/ Febreeze.
Oh .. and Thank You for Febreeze cause it rocks!

So, I see You've decided to clear some time in my schedule.
And...I'm just kinda curious what this means exactly.
I'm sure You have a plan, but...sometimes Your plans aren't so fun for me until after they're over. If that's the case this time.... could you please send me a memo so I can be prepared???

And speaking of preparation, I have the Mary heart down pretty good, but I'm still stuck with this Martha mind so, is there anything we can do about that?

I have a few questions I was hoping You might answer for me. Not exactly *Secrets of the Universe questions, so maybe You will.

Why is it that You created toddlers with more energy than thier mommies?

I mean, I am the one who has to chase them.
I was thinking I might be a little more effective if I could actually catch them.

And Why is it that when I tell one child Noooooo, another one comes right along trying to do the same. exact. thing. that the previous child just got in trouble for.

What's up with that???

Did You create me to run on PuertoRican time? Or is that just something I acquired on my own?

And why is it that when there is a car, tools and a man in a garage, alllll of the *men from miles & miles are drawn to it like somebody pulled out a big magnet and sucked them all in. Where do they come from? Does it really take that many men to change brakes???

I think that's all of the questions I have. For now.

But... there is just 1 little thing I'd like to change, if possible.

I know You don't make mistakes... really .... but ... I think You might have forgotten something when You were putting together my genetic make up. Because .... well ... my Wonder Bra is *wondering where the heck they're at!

Aaaand I'm a little curious too.

Just so You know, out of all the Things That Rock! YOU are the *Most rockin!

P.s Would You please watch over Ashton Kutcher's poor dog?
And I really, really like his green green grass.

P.p.s If You're not too busy can Ya let Ryan Seacrest know that namdropping.... just isn't pretty.

WW Tweens, Robots & HedgeHogs

2009-06-24T09:15:00.000-07:00

Thing1 the *tween thing is very interested in graphic design.

I have NO idea HOW he made these but...

Doesn't he rock!?!?!?

Oh ya! You can go here to see more Wordless Wednesdays ;)

Cheater Cheater Cheater

2009-06-19T07:16:00.000-07:00

Since I like it so much, and because I was SO good at it last time,

It is once again time for...............

I cheat.

Yep.

I'm a cheater.

I say *maybe to my kids instead of giving them a real answer.

Even when I know what the answer is going to be.

I know.

Bad mommy.

But I can't help it.

I felt like I was telling them NO all the time.

"No. You cannot shoot your brother off of a trampoline cannon."

"No. You cannot get up on the stage at Hannah Montana & do the *Ice Cream Freeze."

"No. You cannot slide down the skateboard ramps at the skatepark at church."

No.

No.

No.

Meanwhile theBiggestThingofThemAll is saying...

Sure.

Sure.

Sure.

"Sure. You can use those 2 big hawk feathers to fly to China."

"Sure. You can use this model rocket to shoot your brother to the moon."

"Sure. You can color yourself as a rainbow. Use these markers!"

I was tired of being the mean one. So now I just say...

"Um... maybe."

The Mommy Confessions is a weekly series by Life Starring the Kids & Me.

As moms, many of us have things that we would like to get off our chests or that we would just like to confess. So here is the place to do it!

Once you read here, pop over to her page and link up with Mr. Linky (if he's in the mood).

Join in and spill it....

What's YOUR Mommy Confession?

WW Boys Gone Wild

2009-06-17T09:09:00.000-07:00

Thing4, who loves all things fast & dangerous

under tha hood of an '85 Dodge Charger.

I think it's a charger. Crap. Maybe it's a Ram?? Whatever. It's some kind of Dodge okay.

I won't even try to tell you what kind of bike this is. I have no clue. It's some kind of crotch~rocket that one of theBiggestThingofThemAll's boys does stunts on.

Ain't he cute?

Be sure to Check out more WW's :)
Or if you're like me and you can't keep your mouth shut you can go here.
(Right there. Just click the link!)

The Mommy Confessions....dumdadumdum

2009-06-13T20:28:00.000-07:00

SO, I was bloggy jumping around earlier. I know. There were probably 8 trillion other *things I could have been doing that would have been waaaay more productive.

But I wasn't doing them. I was doing that instead.

While I was doing that I found

And I liked it! So....

TADA...that was my 1st confession.

I wasted an hour and a half today bloggy jumping when I could have been doing more productive things like scrubbing the bathroom floor. Again. Because somehow, even though it gets cleaned every morning, by the end of the day, I feel like I've stumbled into a citgo gas station bathroom.

Which leads me to another confession. I don't really clean the bathroom every morning. I clean it every time I go in there. But I didn't want you to know how anal retentive...er...ocd I am so I wasn't going to tell you that.

But really, I have to be.

There would be no other way to maintain my sanity if I wasn't.

There are (atleast) 6 sets of dirty kid shoes (which can get very dirty by the way) trampling all over it all day, boys who somehow *forget to lift the lid (which is not for lack of being reminded I might add), toddlers who like to make *tissue snow (read: tear up the toilet paper into teeeeeny tiiiny bits and throw them up into the air so they will fall all over the floor, which, by this time, probably has water all over it (because no matter how much clean water the dog has in a bowl the kitchen she prefers to drink out of the *bowl in the bathroom), the mirror has a filmy layer over 1/2 of it because certain little girls decide *leave messages in lipgloss and then try to wipe it off (so mommy doesn't see) ~with toilet paper~ so now the toilet paper is stuck to the floor AND the mirror, not to mention the footprints ON the toilet seat because for some unknown reason atleast half of my children squat ON TOP OF IT to poop.

I don't know why.

I swear I did NOT potty train them in the back yard.

So, if you ever come to my house and have to use the bathroom, please be aware that I try to pick up the bathroom every hour or so, but it only takes 20 minutes for all of that to happen so.....enter at your own risk.

And guess what???

There was another confession.

I'm pretty good at this ;)

Right on!

Ok, while I'm at it I might as well admit......

I know almost every theme song on the disney channel. Including Hannah Montana. Which has got to be some kind of sick. I even caught myself thinking that Billy Ray Cyrus is pretty yummy now, which is odd because his achy breaky heart never did anything for me before. So now I'm wondering, is he really yummier now or does bad taste come with getting old????

I totally ball at the end of Prince Caspian when they have to leave Narnia EVERY single time I watch it.

I am a terrible *what I want to be when I grow up role model* because earlier today, when Thing1 asked Thing5 she wanted to be when she grew up she answered "A big scary monster".
To which Thing2 added "Well mommy you always say anything's possible."
Well...that's not quite what I had in mind when I said that.

Aaaaand the worst confession of all.......

I am a secret~closet Twilight fan.

I've read all of the books.

Okay. Twice.

And seen the movie.

Um....several times.

And I am forcing theBiggestThingofThemAll to take me to see New Moon AS SOON AS it comes out.

Which, I just happen to know is Nov. 20th.

I think I'm all confessed out.

For now.

Do YOU have a mommy confession???
Link up over at Life starring the Kids and Me and let us know.

The self pronounced mule that is....

2007-04-03T18:33:00.000-07:00

My Husband

who has me SO aggravated right now that I can't even begin to put together a rational post. Not that that's anything new. It's not like I am oh~so~rational when I'm not mad. But right now this frustration is really, well, kicking my bootay.

What I would really like to do, is give him an EARFUL (what does that really mean anyway???) I am so mad I could spit.

If I were a spitter.

Which I'm not.

I think it's disgusting. And he's not here to see it anyway. So I would be doing something that I feel is absolutely disgusting for no reason at all. I guess that rules that out.

Instead I'm going to write nice things about him. And maybe, by the time he rolls through the door, I'll be a little less ... 'spitting mad'.

Minus the spit of course.

Because I just explained ~at length~ how I feel about spit. It's up there. Right above this paragraph. In case you forgot already. You can go back and read it. I'll wait.

Ok are you ready to move on to the nice things I have to remember about my husband? Just for the record, I really do NOT feel like being nice to him right now. Or about him. Not even a little bit. This is a struggle. But I will overcome it. I think I can. I think I can....

Oh WOW. You're still here. I'm a little surprised. Sorry I got distracted. I'll move on now.

He tries so hard to be everything for everyone.

There really are so many things I love about my husband. I'm having a hard time remembering all of them at this moment, because he 's human (& a man), so there are also things that I'm not soooo crazy about. Like right now for instance.

But the things that I love *most definently outnumber the things that I don't.

He loves God. With all of his heart and all of his mind and all of his strength.

He loves his family. Sooo much that he works as hard as he has to, to make sure that I have the opportunity to raise them at home where they belong.

He is stubborn and oh ~so~ persistent.

He is crazy and sometimes moody.

He talks to and gets along with anyone. Everyone becomes his 'dog' and he will hand over anything to anyone if they need it.

And I do mean anything.

I'm *so not exaggerating.

Really.

If your husband ever comes home and says to you "Honey, you won't believe it! I asked this random guy if I could borrow $5 and he handed me his wallet. And the keys to his truck. And house. And his wife and kids!" You'll know that he met my husband.

If that ever happens, please give us back. He just got overexcited.

We're used to it by now.

He has an eerie way of looking into someone's spirit and reading thier true hearts. And though it pains me to admit it ...*sigh...he is usually right. (but let's just keep that between us, shall we?)

Not this time of course.

This time I am *absolutely the one who's right. Without a doubt. 100%. 98 %. Okay it's really 50/50 but I'm gonna stick with 100. Because I'm right this time.

I know, I'm being nice.

I better get back to that.

He has an amazing ability for making up really really stupid songs. About nothing. Or anything. Whatever he is doing at any given time. Think of all the things a 'man' does throughout the day. My husband has a song for all of them. It's hilarious, disturbing and adorable all at once. Even more disturbing (and adorable:) is the fact that this trait has oddly been handed down to each and every one of our children.

I know.

Just imagine the things I hear throughout the day.

I'm going over and over my mental checklist... and I'm not seeing the part that says "these things are null & void if you are right"? Does that mean it's not about being right?

Really.

'Cause I would So like it to be about being right.

Hmmm... Guess I have to work on a few of those.

I should go do that.

Flinging diapers and the *surprises left in them!

2007-03-26T17:22:00.000-07:00

Ok so *Elijah Jaye Moose* (Thing4/ 2yob) is going through this "I know how to take my diaper off and will do it whenever I want now" phase. I CANNOT keep up with the flinging of the diapers. He has even learned how to take his pants off to get to the unwanted diaper.

We are working on potty training, but I'm not so sure that it's a sign of potty training readiness. I think he likes to take it off simply because he can! AND he innately knows exactly what to do to make mommy INSANE. Most of the time it is not even wet, although once he left a *surprise* in it (YUCK YUCK and more YUCK)

This child ~ there is absolutely NO ONE that i could love more, or who possibly make me any CRAZIER than he can. But I just can't resist his cute little face!

Could you?

I think I have outsmarted him...atleast for now. I'm sure it won't last toooo long. He is very persistent. I put his diaper on *backwards* and so far he hasn't figured out that the *tabs to freedom* are simply on the other side (hahaa).

Beautiful Mess

WW: The last baby hair

Tackle It Tuesday: I might be a slacker.

Tackle It Tuesday on a Wordless Wednesday

RTT: So Lotta Random, so little time...

Ya so I had this amazing plan....

Quotable Sunday: Total Momsense :) Because THIS is what I say, on ANY given day.

All we need is Love.

8 Crucial Safety Tips for Women and Girls

The Top Ten Things Every Woman Should Know about Personal Safety

Serious Safety Tips for Women

WW: You're so pretty. Ya, I know.

Because Ashton Kutcher Just Rocks!

Going Balls to the Wall... :7 Things to 7 people.

Everybody needs an Emmett.

Because sick is just no funnn!

< insert funny title here >

I just saw the Sexiest.Man.Ever. IDK what he looked like but he had a sponge and a mop and it was hott!

-w8kj_5OXJrOr41x_bs45rz7CqU.txt

WW Thing5 and String Bandaids. OH and Thing4 being NICE. Let's not forget that ;)

Bleeding, PeePee dancing, Flashing... You know... All of the usual stuff you do in a week...

I read something about the more colorful your food is the better it’s supposed to be for you. I think I might even have read it on one of the rtt's from last week.

So I'm wondering if that's real.

And if it includes M&M's.

Because if it is true then they should definitely count.

They are VERY colorful ;)

I was outside talking to a neighbor holding a WIGGLY Thing6. Who decided to pull my shirt down. And you could see.. well..things that are usually NOT seen... And to top it all off 3 construction trucks happened to be rolling by... death by mortification....

The one where God goes from whispering to kicking....

i find it fascinating that SarahJessicaParker can go from butt ugly to insanely hot in a split second. It’s like a hidden super power and I want it!

WW So you think you can (peepee) dance?

Umm...ya. Sorry. I've really just got nothing here....

....when mere words are just not enough to express the intensity of your... love...

WW I didn't write it I just found it so don't be mad at me if you're offended... BUT maybe God likes Chocolate too.....

And God said: Sex is Good...but only if you're married and definently NOT with vampires wearing dirty clothes.

Come Out Come Out Wherever You Are.

WW Note to self: Don't Piss Off Mooses

Random Linky Bloghoppin Stuff. On A Tuesday.

You say goodbye and I say hello.

Open Letter to .. my Wild Child

Aloha *Edward Friday

The Mommy Confessions ... but God said yes!

WW Giving New Meaning To The Term *Happy Ass

So, apparently it's Friday.

Open Letter to ... The Creator. Ya. It's late. So what?

WW Tweens, Robots & HedgeHogs

Cheater Cheater Cheater

WW Boys Gone Wild

The Mommy Confessions....dumdadumdum

The self pronounced mule that is....

Flinging diapers and the *surprises left in them!